Migraine patients who received true acupuncture had no decrease in headaches as compared with those who received sham acupuncture treatment, according to a study in the May 4 issue of JAMA.

It surprises me that this has not been identified before. Yet another example of the healing power of the mind. It’s currently fashionable to criticise western medicine in favour of esoteric chinese medicine, so I wonder how long before the report is accused of rationalist, reductionist bias (As though that were a bad thing).

My treatment is based on science – pump yourself full of panadol, then dance naked in the moonlight with tiger-dick paste on your face. Works for me every time.